Wednesday, November 28, 2012

I Can Write

I grew up back in the era before there were trophies for everyone. Only the best softball team got a trophy (even when I was in elementary school), only the top animal at the fair got the blue ribbon (true still today), and there were no consolation ribbons if you got eliminated from the spelling bee.

Back in 198-something when I was just a young nerd, I entered my first writing contest. It was a K-5 contest at Farmersville Elementary School and I entered a story I had written based on something that really happened when we were on vacation at the lake. Although, the plot had been altered to include several of my spelling words.

I won the "I Can Write" contest, beating out other kids who were older. I knew then that writing would be part of my future. That writing would be part of my career.


I have since won a whole shelf full of awards for my communications work. Some awards were for team efforts, some for my own writing.

But I keep this nearly 30-year-old trophy on a shelf in my bedroom. Some days when cranky clients insist I use the phrase innovative, game-changing solutions or submissions to the boss come back covered in red ink, I remember. I Can Write.

Monday, November 26, 2012

Snapshots on the Farm

Husband is offering some of his bred gilts (young females who are pregnant) in an upcoming auction, so the men took my phone out to capture some of these beauties for purposes of promotion. Like many of us, these females were not too keen on being photographed in their time of bodily change, but I think Husband and Ryan did a good job. I just love the little Justin photo-bomb in this one.
 
 

Saturday, November 24, 2012

The Hottest Girl at Nerd Camp

Recently, I proudly sent my son to a three-day camp for gifted/talented students (he was mainly excited to miss class).

As I helped him pack, it brought back memories of the time I was the most popular girl at nerd camp. Of course, it wasn't officially called nerd camp. I'm sure my mother called it gifted/talented camp too.

I remember very little about what mind-stimulating activities we did that week in the summer of
198-something, but I do remember this: I. Was. POPULAR!

I mean like super, mega, would-have-been-prom-queen, leader of the nerds POPULAR! I really don't know how it happened.

One minute I'm the dorky girl whose mother has to remind her to comb her hair, and the next thing you know I'm being mobbed at the pool.

After all these years, the memory of being sought out, of being in demand, of being envied by others. Whew. What a heady feeling.

I even had a sidekick, Anne. She and I had our pick of the nerd boys. And like in the plot of every good nerd movie, there were a pair who cleaned up pretty well.

The last night of the camp there was a dance. And again, there were boys who had their feelings hurt because I DIDN'T DANCE WITH THEM. They wanted ME.

Image Source

After camp, I tried to recapture the popularity. I visited Anne in another town an hour from here; I sent tapes/letters (there was no Facebook back then) to my cute nerd boy. But I eventually went back to school and back to my nerd status.

Which was fine with me. Popularity can be exhausting. I still managed to have boyfriends and good friends in school (even if many of them were in the band).

My brief brush with popularity almost ruined my college experience. A few years after nerd camp I was accepted into the Honors program at my top choice university and TURNED IT DOWN in an effort to have a clean start on a new campus. BUT when I got there I realized that the way to be popular in college was the same way to be popular in nerd camp--be your smart self.

After an interview with the dean where I had to admit I was afraid her program would label me a nerd, I was re-accepted and went on to have a great experience that included benefits like priority class scheduling and long-term book borrowing at the library (nerd perks!).

I hope that my son gets to go to nerd camp again when he is an awkward pre-teen, like I was. I hope he finds acceptance and fun in being as smart as he can be. And popularity.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Marketing Conundrum in My Ear

Here is a marketing conundrum that has bothered me for a while: How do you market a product that most people buy for a reason you can't acknowledge?

I'm talking about Q-Tips. Come on, you buy them to stick in your ear, admit it. But Unilever has to pretend that you buy them to clean your computer keyboard, swab non-ear parts of your baby and polish your furniture (?)

Dr. Rob Moser says on WebMD that Q-Tips are weapons of ear destruction.

And in case you ever wondered what the braintrust at The Wall Street Journal does over lunch, listen in here:





But seriously, against all medical advice and Q-Tip marketing to the contrary, we buy Q-Tips to STICK IN OUR EAR.

I am trying to imagine what goes on at Q-Tip marketing meetings:

Marketing VP: Well, sales are up this month.

Marketing Peon: LOTS of dirty ears out there, huh!

Marketing Team: SSSSHHHHHH!!

Marketing Director: The results are clearly the results of our improved packaging. The image of the Q-Tip vaguely near the baby's nose is really moving product.

Marketing Peon: But I really think...

Marketing Director: Yep, once we incorporated that image of the Q-Tip pointed at an outdated- looking computer keyboard, sales really started moving.

Marketing Peon: You know...

Marketing Team: SSSSHHHHHH!!

Marketing Peon: Wow. Marketing Q-Tips is really hard. At least we don't call them Baby Gays anymore. Talk about awkward.

 Marketing Team: (Holding ears) LALALALALALALALA!!!!



Any other awkward marketing meetings going on out there? What other products do people buy for reasons that can't be acknowledged?




Saturday, November 10, 2012

Snapshots on the Farm

It's a beautiful fall day on the farm and our 3-week-old Ayrshire dairy heifer, Chocolate Chip, is enjoying some pasture time with her older cousins. Chocolate Chip is unusual as an all-red calf in a red and white breed.


Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Ohio Election Hangover

It's the day after the hotly contested Presidential election. Ohio, after being the center of the political universe, goes back to flyover state status.


I snapped this story-in-a-photo this morning that I feel summarizes the sentiment of the resident of this rural Montgomery County home.

NOTE: I am not making a political statement here, just an observation and an image too strong to pass up.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

How to Spray Paint an Upholstered Chair

How to spray paint upholstery:

Step 1: Get inspired by the very crafty Megan at OmahaHa! and rip off the hideous, ill-fitting cover on the milk-stained but otherwise good chair in your living room.

Step 2: Order four cans of saddle brown paint and hope for a pretty fall day.


Step 3: Make a half-hearted attempt to clean the chair because it seems like you should. Drag your chair outside in the front yard and excitedly start painting. Forget to take a before picture of your milk-stained chair.
 

Step 4: Sit on your porch and take an artsy photo of your chair as it dries from coat one.


 
 
Step 5: Make sure you remember to paint the cushions as you start coat two.
 
Step 6: Leave the chair on the front porch to dry.
 
Step 7: Get home from work and activities after dark for a week so you can't finish final touch-ups.
 
Step 8: Find the last nearly empty spray bottle lying in your yard and use it to get a few places you missed.
 
 
Step 9: Bring your chair inside and take an after picture.
 
Step 10: Enjoy a new chair for a fraction of the price.

Appointment Pooping

  NOTE: If you do not want to read about my healthy bowel movement, well too late you just did. I recently became you-better-get-a-colonosco...