Sunday, September 20, 2009

On the First Day of Job Loss, My Blogger Gave to Me...

Out of a job? Not sure what to do first? Check out my 10-day list of job search assignments.



Catch my full Blogher guest post here.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Guy Reads: Akron Edition

Gotta love my Aunt CS from Akron. She is the Queen of holiday family group photos, a humble health care worker like me, and she even takes time to clip and mail articles for her nephew-in-law (Husband) from the Akron Beacon Journal.

So, thanks to Aunt CS, it's time for another installment of Guy Reads, the exciting segment where I share with you the news items I (and Aunt CS) clip out of the paper for my husband.

Small town side note: when she lived around here, Aunt CS used to share rides to college with my father-in-law. Not knowing that many, many, many years later her niece would marry his son.

Anyway, she surprised us this week with a fascinating story out of Akron about the very rare Red Wattle pigs. They are known for their extremely unattractive under-chin wattles and dark meat.

A little additional research on my part shows that the Red Wattle is "critical" according to standards set by the American Livestock Breeds Conservancy This means that the breed has fewer than 200 annual registrations in the U.S. and estimated global population less than 2,000.

We know a little about rare breeds here on our farm, so we wish the young lady from Akron all the best.

We also know a little about fake cows here on our farm. That's why I was concerned to hear that the police in Akron have been hassling a kind man about his restaurant mascot, Cattlelena. Is that not the best name ever given to a fake cow?

Speaking of great names, the PR person in me just HAS to give it up to the forward-thinking geek at the Akron Beacon Journal who thought to register Ohio.com as their domain name. Some Akronite (Akronian?) back in 1995 really had their sh!t together, besides Aunt CS, that is.

Monday, September 14, 2009

What Farm Kids Do for Fun

I was just watching an episode of Jon & Kate Plus 8 (I'll keep my opinions on the whole thing to myself.). Anyway, in this episode the Gosselin boys went to a dude ranch. They had never seen a horse in real life. Or a goat. And they giggled the whole time about the poop.

What a different life my kids lead. Different than the majority of kids in this flyover State of Ohio, even. I have written before on the theme: What Farm Kids Do for Fun and the things they do are so foreign to people, that I may make this a regular feature. Plus, my little farm kids are very cute while they entertain themselves.

Here are Justin and Morgan making up some sort of barnyard parade that looks wacky even to other farm kids. But this is what you can come up with on a Sunday afternoon when you have a gravel circle behind your house large enough for a semi-tanker to manuever in.

Here's Morgan on the swingset, enjoying a Saturday sunset. She shares her neighborhood only with wrapped hay bales, the odd hay wagon and a soybean field that's looking a little weedy.

Here is Justin in his tree house. It's actually in a split tree trunk two feet off the ground. Even though he has a swing set nearby--that took his father nearly four days to assemble--Justin prefers his made-up hideaway.

So don't feel sorry for the farm kids. Even though they don't have neighbor kids to run around with, or sidewalks for their bikes, they have developed the ability to explore and use their imaginations. And let's face it, they've long ago finished laughing about the poop.

Speaking of poop (we were?) and farm kids having fun, see below, by popular demand, more photos from our fun-filled exhausting week at the 2009 Montgomery County Fair. Enjoy.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Our Favorite Week of Filth and Exhaustion

Summer isn't really over for our family until we have spent a week filthy and exhausted at the county fair.
For most people, a county fair is a nice place they visit on a Saturday afternoon to eat some of the greasiest food ever invented, buy a Sham-Wow, ride a few rides, pet a calf, see some sheep and head home. Yes, that's how normal people "do" the county fair.
Country people, however, are required by the sacred oath of farmers to move in at the county fair, forsaking all other activities or home life. They MUST BE PRESENT lest some cow poop and there be no one to immediately clean it up.
Not only do we gather up our finest livestock and 4-H projects (Ryan isn't old enough for 4-H and yet we still do all this), we create additional work for ourselves, baking cookies, making scarecrows (4th place Angelina Jolie and her babies, above) and taking photos.

The preparation for the fair is work and the being at the fair is draining. And the dirt, good God, the dirt. Greasy asphalt, bleacher dust mixed with poop and shavings, random blackness--all coating the knees of my children and streaking down their faces like they had sh!t for dinner. (Pre-fair, fairly clean photo of Justin above with his soon-to-be 1st place owl cupcakes.)

But for every moment spent vacuuming straw out of the carpet or every load of laundry, there are great moments like these: Ryan winning first place in pee-wee swine showmanship (above), Morgan winning third in the kiddie tractor-pull, Justin collecting a ribbon in the pig show.

We know why we spend a week at the fair filthy and exhausted--it's the best place in the world we could be.

Appointment Pooping

  NOTE: If you do not want to read about my healthy bowel movement, well too late you just did. I recently became you-better-get-a-colonosco...